My first blog, the first step on a path of self discovery

So after many hours of deliberation, bottles of wine, explicit experiences and talks with friends…I’ve decided to blog. How did this ever come about? A single person, singing like a lark about their personal life to the world. I mean, www or world wide web… it’s everyone right? Everyone in the world can read your thoughts, transcribed to words if you choose to allow them. So be it. Hence, I remain anonymous, for the sanctity of my family, friends and job.

I’m your typical girl next door that you've always wondered about. 12 years of grade school with mediocre grades, four and a half years of drinking, studying and living the dream at a well known, reputable state school and an endless number of meaningless jobs…all leading up to this life I call mine.  Oh did I mention late 20's and single? :)

I’ve always been an author, I write my life. Teens today text, people my age wrote notes; it was an interesting experience. You wrote all your thoughts, plans and true loves down on ruled note book paper, folded it up (I knew some pretty cool folds) and placed them in the hands of a neighboring student to be passed to the intended recipient. In middle school we discussed clothes, music, boys, television… In high school we discussed clothes, boys, drinking and parties… In college, shit, we finally had instant messenger. Now we have texting, facebooking, myspace, twitter and blogging (as I’m writing on my 2004 mac, I just had to add 4 of the 5 past words to my spell-check dictionary.) It’s kind of scary right? Your emotions are so visible to the world, just lose your password or send to the wrong person and you can kiss your privacy good-bye.

I recently found a diary I kept my freshman year of college, a detailed account of parties, sex, drinking, sex, friendships, sex and the first time I thought I fell in love. Reading it now makes me blush, it’s been 7 years since my first entry and the second I see the words, all those intense emotions come flooding back like the waters after Katrina. I drown every time I remember.

So what is my blog going to be about? Sports? No… Politics? No… Fine cuisine? Negative… Although I love all of the above, this will be about me, purely narcissistic, self-indulgent and uniquely, elegantly, perverse. Only one person in my life will know this exists and she will be appear ever-so-often as she knows all my deepest secrets. Her name is Holly Wood and she is my life partner, no, not my lesbian lover (although maybe I’ll discuss that coke induced evening at some time) she is my best friend and platonic soul mate. Yet in 10 years if neither is married, we’re both going to become lovers of pussy, adopt half-black, half-asian children (as gorgeous as the famed Tiger Woods) and live the rest of our lives together in the mid-west happy and dykey. (Please no hate from the GLBT community, we love and respect you and mean no disrespect, in fact Holly is bi and I might as well be.)

Speaking of the famed Tiger Woods, I believe my first entry of my blog will be about this current scandal rocking the nation. I hold a pure hatred for infidelity. Unacceptable, the ruining factor for millions of lives and a horrible fact of life and history which only exists because certain people of the world believe that they are better than others. I am not saying I have always thought this way, as I my self was once the “Other woman.” However, I have since seen the light and will never again hurt an innocent, unknown person in a way that only brings self-pity, meaningless sex and self-hatred right to my front door. Sorry, I’ve begun to drive off onto a tangent…the first of many.

Back to Tiger. I feel pity for Elin Woods and their two beautiful children, it is a selfish and pitiful act to cheat on your family. I say family because when a family person strays from their marriage, they are not only cheating on their spouse, but also their children, their in-laws, their friends and themselves. HOWEVER, any woman who willingly marries a professional athlete loses most of the sympathy I would give Mrs. John Doe. An athlete plays a game for a profession, they play against others for a prize, they play a sport, they play for competition, no matter what they are doing… they play. They are players by nature, raised to compete for what they desire most, a championship ring, a trophy the size of a midget, a green jacket or even any person they desire. Care to argue? There are always exceptions to every rule and although you don’t have to be a professional athlete to cheat, your chances of doing so are far beyond those of the man next door. I won’t pretend that only athletes cheat, I’ve been cheated on by the biggest loser I ever dated, and he was purely blue collar. Men (and women) every where cheat, but give a man an interview on ESPN and a weekly pay check that rivals my yearly salary and your chances of getting laid outside of marriage skyrockets. How do I know…

Been there done that. I’ve been around these men. NBA players, NFL players, collegiate athletes, Indy car drivers, professional golfers, many of which I’ve slept with. I’m not bragging, as in fact I am ashamed. It takes a certain type of woman to gravitate towards these men, ones who desire a famed life, crave jealousy, or even simply just love sex. These women, jersey chasers as they are often called are a unique breed of women. Often characterized by their beauty, lavish lifestyles and their distinct ability to attract men that 99% of women will never have a chance of even meeting. These women have a desire to be something or someone special even if it’s just a glamorized whore.

I am that woman. I’d like to say I’m reformed because I’ve grown morally and emotionally however in all honesty it’s because I’m no longer a spring chicken and have lost my luster. But once upon a time a beautiful princess lived a life she desired, was loved by many, partied with lesser known local celebrities and would watch ESPN while secretly thinking how the basketball player on tv ate her pussy raw the night before.

I didn’t sleep with only the famed and fortunate, I’ve had crazy encounters with many men and a handful of women that are your everyday co-workers, friends, ex’s and even mothers. It’s somewhat embarrassing, a slight bit thrilling and vastly unique this life I’ve lived. My life motto, I’ll never regret what I’ve done I’ll just learn from my mistakes and keep on living.

I sign off now, my initial adventure into this blogging world with a vast array of stories, adventures, heart breaks and trauma.